I was unpacking our Christmas tree ornaments when it hit me: every shiny bauble, every hand-painted memory seemed to carry a weight I hadn’t expected. There was the ornament from our first holiday together — the one I used to smile at every year — and now it felt like a sharp reminder of betrayal. My chest tightened, and I fought back tears. I thought, How can I celebrate when everything feels broken?
Facing the Painful Memories and Finding God in the Midst
Then I remembered Isaiah 41:10: “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Even in the ache, He is present, offering strength when my own fails.
This season, I’ve learned that facing the holidays after betrayal doesn’t mean pretending everything is fine — it means creating space for both grief and hope. Here’s what has helped me stay anchored and practical:
1. Acknowledge Your Triggers
Make a mental note (or journal) of what memories or traditions feel painful. Name them out loud in prayer, asking God to meet you in the discomfort.
2. Set Boundaries Early
Politely decline gatherings that feel overwhelming. Leave events early if your emotions start to spiral. Communicate your needs to family or close friends in advance.
3. Create New, Safe Traditions
Pick one small activity that feels joyful or calming — reading a devotional, lighting a candle, listening to worship music. Focus on rituals that honor your healing rather than past expectations.
4. Lean on God Daily
Begin or end each day with Scripture and prayer. For me, Isaiah 41:10 is a steady reminder that God holds me when my heart is fragile. Repeat simple prayers like: “God, help me feel Your presence in this moment.”
5. Include Supportive People
Spend time with friends or mentors who understand your journey. Let someone check in with you, even just for accountability and encouragement.
The holidays may still feel messy. Some ornaments will sting, some traditions will ache. But God is in every corner of the season — in quiet prayers, small joys, and steady reminders that you are seen, loved, and upheld.
You don’t have to go through this alone. Step by step, with God as your guide, you can navigate the season with honesty, grace, and a little bit of hope.
Download your free Facing Your First Holiday After Betrayal: A Faith-Based Checklist here.
For more holiday support, check out our From the Vault Holiday Workshop Webinars.